My Current State of Mind & Feeling

I was swarmed with work and re-building my life after the crushing heartbreak. Finally, I’m happy to share that I’m doing well in both departments 😁😁! Business opportunities are growing at a steady pace although all the big deals I’m working on currently are still work in progress, but at least I have a chance to close those deals. In fact, I have a pretty good and positive feeling that I might be able to pull off a few big deals in the next 6 months. I’m feeling euphoric that my hard work is slowly paying off. I have created a blue ocean for myself and company. Nothing beats the intense feeling of satisfaction that I get every time I looked back at how far I had come. It isn’t pay day yet, but the signs are very positive that I will hit jackpot in the next 6 months to 1 year. I just need to stay focus, motivated and continue to think creatively to develop more new clients and learn new things.

Not only I can feel the changes in me, I can see it clearly as well. Are they good changes or bad? Hmmmm……I guess it depends on each individual acceptance level. Personally, I think those changes were good for me as it were part of my growing up process. But to some people who have known me previously before the changes took place, they might not like the new me.

In the past, I always checked up on my friends and made sure they were well and fine. But now, I don’t do much of it. Mainly is because I don’t want to absorb any unnecessary negative energy. I usually shy away when I sense any negative vibes heading towards me. Last time, I absorbed a lot and even did my best to cheer my friends up by sharing my positive energy/vibes with them, which not only drained me but also made me worried about them. I realised now that I don’t want to be their sounding board anymore Β  as we are all adults hence we should deal with the drama in our life ourselves. I was always very giving until I my caring and giving nature were fully taken advantage of by underserving people, such as Peter Wittendorp and my crazy mum. Both of them used and took advantage of my compassionate nature repetitively and stabbed my in my heart. Seriously, they were a few parallels from both of them on how they used and treated me. Thank god I cut both of them out of my life for good. They couldn’t hurt me anymore!

I’m not sure I will be able to fully forgive them for what they did, said and treated me. I don’t break down and cry anymore as I had accepted the facts, but occasionally I felt a tinge of sadness when I recounted the stories to friends. Once a blue moon thing though. Recently I was shown a pic of my crazy mum and I didn’t even want to look at her face. And I’m definitely not interested to know about her current life!! I don’t want dramas and disturbance to be heaped on me again!

I had also looked at the pictures of Β Peter Wittendorp just recently and what I saw was a stranger. The face that I used to love, the laughter that made me giddy and happy, the man that I thought was a good man and Mr Right for me was dead on April 18, 2016 when he did the unspeakable to me! I didn’t know then, but it was the night that he robbed my happiness, compassion and ability to trust people from me. It took me 1 year to recover, but I will never be able to trust people like I used to anymore. I used to take people words as trustworthy, but not anymore. Words need to be backed up by consistent Β actions before I will accord my trust to them.

So now the man in the picture is a pathological liar, a hypocrite, a fakey and an asshole. I feel like a fool for falling for Peter Wittendorp, sucking in all his words and putting up with his shitty treatments and the emotional turmoil he put me through! Seriously, it was really ironic for a pathological liar (2 years) like him to throw accusation at me! What a fucking joke! To be honest, I don’t think I will ever be able to stop cursing him for what he did to me. I don’t know why, but every time when I wrote his name I feel the urge to cuss him and I will become 😀😀! I think I better stop or else I will make myself upset over an asshole!!

Anyway, overall I’m in a good place emotionally, mentally and physically. The upset feeling I had passed by quickly so it doesn’t affect me. Now my full attention are given to my business and getting my financial back in order so that my lifestyle will not be greatly affected by a temporary setback. That sums up my current state of mind and feeling.

Till the next post peeps!

 

 

 

Recognised and recognition

Last Thursday (17.11.16), I attended a networking event held by a Developer. I was introduced to this Developer by a mutual friend. I stayed for about 2 1/2 hours with my business partner. I didn’t socialise much as I don’t enjoy doing small talk with strangers and pass my name cards around. I prefer smaller group event because then conversation will be more fruitful and with substance. Anyway, I had my partner there so we took this opportunity to catch up on work as we don’t see each other often in the office.

We were introduced to a few people by my Developer’s friend and we made some small talk. Buffet was served and we grabbed some food to eat. After dinner, we continued to drink and sat there to chat with 1 of the new guy introduced to us.

As we were chatting away, suddenly I heard someone called my name and I turned to see who it was. It was a woman. Before I had a chance to say a word, she told me her name, Janet, and mentioned that she didn’t think I know her, but she knows who I’m. She said she was my ex-colleague at my ex-company where I first joined as a real estate agent. I was like ok. She went on to tell me that we joined in the same year (2001) and she can still remember me because there was 1 year I beat my ex-company top performer in sales and became No.1. Frankly, I vaguely remember. I asked her if she was sure since it was over a decade ago! She assured me and her partner who was also my ex-colleague (different branch) also confirmed what she told me. I asked them further how could they recognised me since it was over a decade ago. They said I still look the same! Haha. I take it as a compliment. It means I aged well πŸ˜€πŸ˜œ!

Janet also told me she actually tracked my movement for awhile! Eerie…..because she wasn’t the first person to tell me that. A few other people whom I don’t know and never met before know who I’m and they also told me they tracked my deals and movements. They could listed out some of the big deals I had done in the past. It was flattering to know that my competitors viewed me as a worthy opponent and a threat, but it is also worrying as in my line of work I need to be low profile because if not then there is a risk the deals I’m working on will be exposed before I close the deal.

There is nothing I can do to avoid being track because I’m known in the industry and people are curious about me. Beside, I don’t know them and even if I do I’m terrible at remembering faces especially if I met them briefly only. It is definitely a recognition to be recognised by my peers and competitors in the industry, but is also a curse because I don’t want my competitors to smell the deals I’m working on!! Anyway, it is unavoidable. I just have to be more careful and goes even lower profile than I’m now to safeguard my deals.

It is definitely a Catch 22 situation. Is nice to get the recognition, but it is also sucks to be recognised!! πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜«

 

 

30th Sept last day

My last day at my present company is on 30th September. Yesterday afternoon, my Country Head asked to speak to me and we had about an hour of friendly chat. No hard feelings between us. In fact, she even complimented me a few times. She said I was creative, daring and possess entrepreneur traits that not many people possess. But she also said I lacked of leadership skills. Haha. Her definition of leadership skills and mine are very different so I didn’t even bother to correct her thinking. I don’t show her all my skills because I don’t want her to be able to read me well. In the business world, I need to retain some skills set if I want to succeed in a shark eat shark world πŸ˜‰! The more she underestimates me, the better it is for me. Haha. I reach a level that I don’t need to proof to anyone how good I’m. My results will be the best proof of how good I’m πŸ˜‚! I won’t be able to share openly my plans and strategies as I don’t know who will stumble upon my blog and read my business plans. I don’t mind sharing about my personal life as I have nothing to hide, but not my business plans! I need to keep my business plans under wrap and a secret until I achieve my goals. Haha.

So for now I have to keep everyone in suspense except for my business partners and a few close friends πŸ˜›! Anyway, I think the universe is starting to send me more good news. I have a good feeling and are very positive that I will be able to achieve my goals in the time frame I have set for myself. Can’t wait for next week to be over because then I can start focusing on my own plans.

My chapter at the present company will be officially closed. It had been an interesting and fun experienced working with my Country Head who used to be my biggest competitor and now we are on friendly terms. She actually said we are friends and she said she welcome any opportunities for us to work together in the future. Although she can be very demanding and bulldozing, but she is a nice person. We shared many light moments full of laughter. I made a few new acquaintances. So overall it was a pleasant experienced. I might miss the bantering and joking with my colleagues. But then we can always hangout for drinks occasionally so I will still see them, just not on a daily basis.

Anyway, looking forward to starting a new chapter and adventure in my career. I’m ambitious, but I don’t like to climb the corporate ladder. I want to create my own little empire. Haha. Wish me best of luck!!

 

 

Friday the 13th – Lucky Day (13.5.16)

Is always considered as an unlucky day due to the horror movies franchise. No wonder I received I saw the picture of the witch and the jackass last night. Again thanks to my friend :-)! He got an earful from me this morning. Anyway, instead of an unlucky day for me, I consider it a good day as I received a call from a buyer who is keen to buy some properties and he wants to view it later of the day. But the biggest luck it has brought me is the realisation that I will never get a sincere apology from ‘him’ as he never see anything wrong with his actions and words. It also allows me to see clearly now that he is never the man he projected to the world. And it isn’t a loss not to have him as a friend because he only used me to feed his ego and satisfied his own agenda. Only a selfish man will do that. An evolved man will never hurt a woman even if is it just a friend. I believe in Karma and I’m sure 1 day he will gets a taste of his own medicine either directly or indirectly.

Don’t want to have a fakey in my life. He preached integrity, but he is lacking of it. He preached moral and faithfulness, but yet he doesn’t practice it himself. He preached big heart and respect, but yet he doesn’t know how to give respect and definitely don’t have a big heart at all. No wonder our views on life are so different because I can’t convince a jerk who wears a mask and practice double standard to see the beauty of being true to ourselves. A liar and pretender will never understand how to stop wearing a mask! I always told him to be fair, but he said life isn’t fair. Life is not fair is because we human choose not to treat people fairly.

Anyway, the picture was a good shock I needed to wake me up. Haven’t seen such an ugly witch and a jackass in human forms! Don’t think anyone has before. Not sure. But seriously just plain scary. Luckily I managed to sleep well last night. No bad dreams or insomnia :-)!

Finally, will I still write about him and disclose his identity officially? Hmmm…..I don’t think I will disclose his name or anything that can point out who he is easily, but I might drop hints now and then when I feel I want to be cheeky and rebellious! Hahaha! I think I will just drop clues in my posts. LOL! I think it is quite fun to let people guess although I doubt any of my readers can figure out his identity. Well, just for fun.

First clue : He is Dutch.

Second clue : Lives in Singapore

———–

At. 5.51pm – just returned home after a site visit and the client confirmed buying the office suites. Yay! Next week signing the SPA. And potentially he might wants to buy bigger property too. See, Friday 13th isn’t a bad day for me. In fact it is a LUCKY DAY!

And today, I will exterminate his existence in my mind and heart! He is officially DEAD TO ME!

Restauranteur experienced

I took 2.5 years off from a very flourishing real estate career to indulge in my dream of owning a restaurant and bar. I gave up 7 digits of  yearly nett income to pursue a dream that gave me zero income. Sounds foolish and stupid right?? Haha yes I was a stupid fool, but a happy fool nonetheless. Seriously, I have no regret opening the restaurant and bar although it was a lot of hard work that took a lot of my time, energy, effort and money especially when I didn’t make a single profit since I opened until the day I sold off the business.

So what do I gained in returned? New friendship, new connections, enhanced palate in food, educated in wines and whiskeys, developed higher quotient of patient and tolerant, but most importantly I fulfilled my dream of owning  a restaurant & bar. When I started the business I genuinely believed that I was going to make a lot of money from this new venture and that I would switched career from real estate into F&B industry. Haha. Some said I was naive, some said I was crazy, some said I was brave and some couldn’t even understand why I would want to give up an easy and lucrative career in real estate and jumped into a tough and strenuous business like F&B! Seriously, I had the same conversation with so many different people who knew I was the owner and couldn’t resist asking me how and why I got into F&B?? And my answers to them were and are always the same…..because I wanted a place of my own to hangout with my family and friends, to meet new people, to connect and also to fulfil my dream!! I miss having a joint of my own to hangout. I used to see my friends more often because they would come over to my restaurant to dine, wine and hangout, but now we need to pick a place to go and sometimes we ran out of options. We are quite picky of the restaurant and bars we like to go to πŸ˜πŸ˜›!

I was also asked if I will venture back into F&B in the future and my answer is also a resounding YES, I will!! I’m not scared from this experienced. In fact, I had learned so much from operating the restaurant for 2 years, I know clearly now where were my mistakes and what I did wronged. I’m very sure the next time I open a new restaurant & bar, it will be a success and a profit making business πŸ˜†! But it won’t be so soon as I need to focus on achieving the RM10mil goal I have set for myself. So 1 goal at a time or else I will accomplish nothing!

So in conclusion, just like every decision I had made in my life, I don’t regret opening and owning a restaurant business. It had given me a wonderful experienced, added a lot of colours into my life and it also gave me a story to tell. I find that whenever I told people about my story from a very successful real estate consultant (top 3 in the market) to a restauranteur and then back to real estate with a much bigger goal and target this time around, people weren’t only impressed, but also admired to a certain extent. Not many people, especially women would give up a lucrative income, took 2.5 years of sabbatical, travelled and explore the world, living the life my way.

My life is definitely filled with adventures and tales to share, be it good or bad 😎! New people I met always find me vibrant, positive, bubbly, interesting and intriguing. They also  find me genuine and blunt. Hahaha. Well, for sure I’m not a fake and I will always live my life the way I want and I will always say what I want! I will continue to seek new adventures and experiences to enhance my life πŸ˜‚!

 

 

24.8.16 – 3rd wave in business

The start of a new adventure and chapter in my career. The new company name has been approved. Finally, after a long wait. Things are definitely moving now. The new office space is also confirmed. Name cards and letterhead are in the midst of being design. So looking forward to creating and achieving another milestone in my business venture. This round will be a 3rd wave for me hence the goals I’m chasing is 5x more than the last goal I set and achieved in 2012.

So what’s the goal I have set for myself? RM10mil nett income in 2 years!Β When I told people my goal, their 1st statement was, “wow”, then followed by “can I work for you?” or “how are you going to do that”, “how much sales do you have to sell?”

Although no one had said to me my goal is crazy or impossible, but I could tell from their questions that they thought I’m talking big and acting crazy. Hahaha. Don’t blame them for having such thoughts about me and my goal. To 80% of population, earning RM10mil in 2 years is a gigantic and impossible task and goal to achieve. Even to me, it won’t be easy, but it isn’t impossible! Definitely it will be very challenging, but I’m going to give it my 200%. It will be the biggest challenge and highest goal I have set for myself to date πŸ˜†!

And honestly I’m feeling very excited and charged by this new goal. I have a few plans in mind and a few of my friends told me they will help me to achieve my goal. Haha. They are definitely in a position to help me to reach my goal quickly as they have a lot of good contacts and also they are on the lookout to buy valuable properties. Aside from them, I also have new pool of rich clientele so that will increase my chances of hitting my set goal πŸ˜†πŸ˜†!

Bottomline is I will give it my all!! Wis me luck! Haha. Enjoy the article.

10 Traits That Define Entrepreneur Success

p.s. The adrenalin rush of chasing big deals and big goals are as good as having great sex. The success in closing a mega deal with a 9 digit value is an aphrodisiac for me πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚!

 

 

Resigned

On Friday, 19.8.16, I wrote to my Country Head and informed her of my decision to resign. I Β  will tender my official resignation letter on Monday, 22.8.16. I really don’t enjoy working in a rigid corporate structure. And I won’t be able to make as much money compare to if I’m working by myself. I have set a giant goal for myself – RM10mil commission in 2 years and I don’t have time to waste if I want to achieve this giant goal. Beside, why should I build a new market and pass all my clients database to a company that doesn’t provide a good reward system. Also, I don’t plan to climb the corporate ladder. Corporate is just too stuffy for me. I feel like I’m in a cage. I’m a bird who can’t be caged. I want to fly and soar as high as I can.

And if I have to create a blue ocean, I should do it to for my own maximum benefits and no one else. I really want to challenge myself and see how far I can go and how much more I can achieve in my career this time around. I don’t want to do the regular leasing deals anymore. I want to carve out a niche and I have the whole plan in my head already.

So is time for me to bid corporate goodbye and free myself from the cage that I put myself in for the last 8-9 months. My Country Head said she will discuss with me next week on when will be my last day and also the outstanding cases and commission payout.

Anyway, looking forward to the new challenges. Have to regain my financial freedom in the shortest time as I have a a few big tickets commitment that I need to take care on a monthly basis. Burning a big hole in my bank account so need to replenish it back asap!

Wish me luck πŸ˜„