Last night in Bali. This year I decided to come to Bali for my birthday instead of Europe. Was in Europe for 2 weeks last year so this year didn’t feel like traveling too far beside I need to save up for my year end trip to NZ. Financially not so flexible yet so have to watch my budget. Beside I ordered a nice diamond bangle as a birthday present for myself so rather spend it on something pretty and bling bling. 😛😀😉
Got in to Bali on 11th and flying out tomorrow noon. Was also here to catch up with my gf, Valentina, whom I met during my solo trip to Samui about 5-6 years ago. She picked me up during breakfast at the hotel 😂😂😂! That was how we described how we met. She is an Italian, but lives in NYC and also a US citizen. She is nice and a good person. Pretty too.
We got closer this trip as we shared more about personal stories as it was just the two of us unlike before. I told her my story with Peter and she listened without judgment. She reminded me to focus on the good things I want to have in my life and not focus on the bad stuffs. Like everyone, she asked me to cut him off. I told her I did which was true. Anyway, it was nice to spend sometime with her and stay away from dramas even just a few days.
I didn’t do much this trip. Just spent it sleeping, eating and chilling out with Valentina. Tanning by the pool, enjoying the amazing ocean view and cool breeze. I felt very relax and trouble free. I know once I return home I will start to stress again as a lot of things are waiting for me to solve. Just a peaceful few days to shut down. Better than nothing.
It would have been perfect ending if I get to spend time with Michaeal and fulfill my Bali dream. I really enjoyed his company. He is so well traveled and so much stories to share with me. He is 6 feet 4, the tallest man I have met in my life so far. Lean and attractive in his own way. French but not your typical French. Speaks a few languages. Successful and he can cooks too. Witty and flirtatious as well 😂😂. Hence I like to get to know him better. There is a possibility he will moves back to Asia so who knows. But then again, it was just a wish and a thought. Nothing more!
The good thing about this encountered is I know I’m ready to go out to mingle and meet new people. I’m moving on and the past is the past. I don’t care what is written about me and Peter anymore. It won’t upset me further. I have stopped googling my name for about 6 weeks now so don’t really know what shit was wrote about me and him. I had made peace with my past and apologized to him for my childish and vengeful actions on 11th August. I will write about it separately.
So I’m 41 years old now and learning a lot about myself and life in the past 1 year. I realised that I’m more expressive with my feelings and live a life that fits the core me. I feel more align with my inner self and I know what I want from a man and a relationship. No more unnecessary compromises. It isn’t worth it. The appearance of Michael showed and reminded me again that there are so much better options out there. When the time is right, I will meet a man who is in sync with me.
Peter was a lesson I needed to learn. Now I finally understood this phrase! He was a passing storm that I needed to meet head on before I could see clear blue sky and gain more clarity into my life journey and the type of man I want to have as a partner. Peter has qualities I liked, but also dislikes. I could differentiate those clearly now. I have to admit he was a harcore lesson for me as it exposed my vulnerabilities, but it also helped to strengthen me too. Is kinda yin and yang! But irregardless I benefited it. I choose to see the positivesness of every lesson and every person in my life.
Not only I know who I’m deep down, but I love who I’m fiercely! I will just get better and better as I’m evolving to become a better version of myself without changing the core me. I’m grateful for everything I have in life now, for the family and friends who love me for me, for having the balls and guts to chase after my wildest dream and goals! I will continue to live a rocking life 😛😉😀!
I’m siting outside an open deck with the open ocean in front of me and under the moon and stars. Enjoying the cool ocean breeze and the live music coming from Potato Head. I’m lucky and bless! Truly bless!
Thank you universe for a beautiful night. Definitely a good birthday break in Bali 😀😀😘😘!