My 1st Poem (written on 13.7.14)

Close your eyes

Listen to my voice and laughter

Embrace the sensation of my mind

Feel from the bottom of your heart

For once, don’t think and don’t analyse the friendship/relationship between us

Just be honest with yourself and me

Don’t put what we have built in the last 6 months on back burner

We want the same thing – to be more than friend. This is a fact

I wasn’t hallucinating about your feeling for me

I wasn’t delusional about what you want from me and where you want us to be

You can read back all the emails you sent to me

Your messages were loud and clear

But your voice was silent

You said you didn’t play mind games with me

Hence, what you wrote in the 950 emails were your honest feelings for me

Then why are you denying it?

Why do you have to make me feel like I was throwing myself at you?

When I wasn’t at all

I was just reacting and reciprocating to your feelings for me

I’m not needy or desperate

I just value the mental connection we have made

We both know it isn’t easy to be able to connect to someone mentally

But we found it in each other

To throw it away now is a waste

I know you are not emotionally available and connected to me yet

I understand because I’m in the same shoes as you

But at least I’m trying on my end

I will give you time, but please don’t take forever

Because I might not be around on this planet tomorrow

I might DIE tonight when I go out

No one knows the future

Live for the present

There is an expiry date for everything

Including life

Don’t let me be your regret and loss

When it need not be as I’m still around

You said I’m a distraction

I still don’t understand why

Especially when you are still looking at my pics

Thinking of me occasionally

Hahaha.

You are impossible at times

I don’t know why I like you so much

I wish I didn’t

But I do

So nothing I can do

Except to accept the fact

If you really want me to forget my feeling and mental connection to you

I WILL

But you have to look me in the eyes and tell me directly

Not thru email or SMS or phone

Tell me in person if you truly want me to move on

Without giving you a final chance

BELIEVE ME

I can move on right now even if I want to

I just don’t want to do it yet

I just want ONE last try

Before I give up on you entirely

I’m a strong woman

I gave up on you 6x in the last 8 years

I will have no problem doing it again

Please don’t underestimate me

I’m not what you think I’m

You haven’t know me well enough

I hope you will soon

Your indifferent frustrated me sometimes

But the good thing about me is

I move on and forget fast

That’s the beauty of ME 🙂

Take some times to understand me

You will be surprised and impressed

By your DISCOVERY

I’m like an onion

With many layers for you to peel off

Before you get to the heart and core of ME

You didn’t contacted me just wanting to be my friend

We are always friend

You wanted and still want something more

You want to be my LOVER

But the timing sucks

I was truly disappointed when you BROKE your promised to fly to KL

I forgave you because I trust you

I was doubtful of your reasons

Because it was such a coincident

But I chose to TRUST YOU

Therefore I forgave you

I hope you wouldn’t disappoint me again

Or break your promises to me anymore

I’m a simple woman

I just want to enjoy you as much as possible

Before it is too late

If you care and like me so much as you said

Don’t let me go

Don’t push me aside

Don’t keep me at arm length

Show me the real YOU

And allow me to show you ME

We will be best friend and lover

An experience you will never forget

If you choose wisely

Or it will be the biggest regret and loss in your life

if you choose wrongly

🙂

We shall see.

Wow, the above rhyme. I’m impressed with myself.

Hahaha

A poignant and touching poem. If I can call it that

Hehehe

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