Three simple words, but the power of these three simple words is massive especially when the person who says it is sincere. These are the 3 simple words that everyone wish to hear from the person who hurts them. It is a quickest and simplest way to make amend. It won’t erase the hurt, but at least it is the 1st step to healing. Saying “I am sorry” doesn’t mean losing your ego, but it means you are admitting and owing up to your mistake. It shows that you are remorseful for causing hurts, sadness and pain to another person because of your words and actions. It shows that you are brave enough to admit you are wrong and you want to make peace and work things out. It also shows that you value the person and the relationship/friendship more than your ego and being right.
But then to some people, saying I am sorry is like pulling a tooth without anesthesia therefore they are unwilling to do so. For some, it is because of ego and pride. This category of people always think they are right and will never admit they are wrong. They will twist the fact and blame you instead. Or even if they do apologised, their apology isn’t sincere or genuine.
A sincere apology should just be simple and straightforward. For example, “I am sorry I hurt you”. “I am sorry for making you cry”. “I am sorry I doubted you. It won’t happen again”. Basically, take responsibility for your words and actions and accept the repercussions.
A non-sincere apology will be like, “I am sorry, but you started it” or “I am sorry that you misunderstood me.” This type of apology is still blaming the other party for triggering the fight/argument. A lot of people fall into this category.
So which category I fall into? Most of the time I apologise sincerely, but there were times I felt I was arm twisted into saying sorry hence it fell into non-sincere category.
Learn to apologise sincerely especially when you know you are wrong. It goes a long way with the person who received and accepted your apologise. But then again, there is also very high possibility that you will never get any apology. It all depends on the person ……whether he/she is willing to accept his/her mistakes.
If a person who hurts me deeply refuses to apologise to me, I won’t force the person to do it because then it isn’t a sincere apology. Never ever force someone to apologise especially when they don’t want to admit their mistakes. I will let them be, but I won’t respect them anymore and I will stop caring for them.
So when you need to apologise, please do it sincerely so that the receiving party feels better and also to show that you take responsibility for your actions and words. It is utmost important to be a responsible person! Remember that!